When bad dates happen to good people

We’ve all been there. That exact moment when you know the date is over. That moment when you wish you could turn back time, enter a parallel universe or just fake a really good seizure. I was told this story a while ago and I haven’t been able to forget it. This one is called ‘the one with the county pub’.Let’s call her Amy

So Amy lives in the countryside and has a couple of young boys. Online dating, therefore, is a bit of an effort involving babysitters, meticulous planning and travelling across county borders.

The date

But hey she had been chatting to a pleasant guy for quite a while online and getting on like a house on fire. It was time to meet. She arranged a flexible babysitter, bribed the boys, fed the horses, dolled herself up and headed out for a two hour cross country drive to meet this guy who lived two counties away. She pulled up to the pub car park the same time as he did, so they strolled in together, making small talk about the journey,

when he said

“You’re lucky I made it today”
“Oh yes, why’s that?”
“I’ve just come out of hospital. I probably shouldn’t tell you what for”.
“Then, please don’t,” she said
“I’ve just had treatment for an anal fissure”.