5 winning ways to secure that second date
Hey Saturday shouts out to Urban Social who contributed this guest blog post sharing their tips on how to secure that important second date.
You might think successful first dates are the kryptonite to online dating websites who want to keep you on their site as long as possible. Great first dates often lead to second dates, and second dates can lead to third, fourth, and fifth dates. Before long, these singles become couples and they no longer need the dating website.
Photo credit: Audra for Hey Saturday, NYC
But the truth is, we at Urban Social LOVE hearing about fun-filled first dates, because that’s always the first step on the road towards meeting the one. And that’s why we started our site; to help sociable singles make meaningful connections.
So, instead of discouraging you from landing a second date, we want to help. Here are our top 5 ways to secure a second date in 2018:
Be Prepared
If you’re serious about nabbing that coveted second date, don’t turn up to the first without undertaking a little preparation. This means reading back over any messages and texts you’ve exchanged with your date and picking out a few key talking points.
Doing so should help you avoid asking the same questions and appearing inattentive in the process. Just make sure you avoid the trap of social media. The last thing you want to do is ask about that trip to Corfu in 2011 – that’s crossing the line from attentive and to downright obsessive!
Be Present
It might seem obvious, but if you want to successfully navigate a first date towards a second, you need to be present. Typically, people dislike spending too much time with someone who’s rude, arrogant, or oblivious.
By all means, be confident, be funny, but don’t make risky jokes, whip out your phone to fill awkward silences, or fail to meaningfully engage with your date. Even if it’s not love at first sight, you owe them your full and undivided attention.
Did You Know? – Almost 25% of all first dates are now arranged online. And singles that meet online are more likely to secure a second date. Why? Because they spend more time getting to know one another before they meet!
Be Grateful
First dates can be expensive; haircuts, new clothes, coffee, dinner, drinks, tickets – it can certainly add up! But one thing that won’t cost you a penny? Your manners.
A favourite of parents and grandparents everywhere, good manners cost nothing. And it’s important that you remember this when you meet your date for the first time. Show gratitude for the little things, offer to split the bill, and say thank you at the end of the evening. You might not win a second date for being polite alone, but it’ll certainly help.
Be Mysterious
A classic first date mistake made by many is to overshare from the moment you sit down. Let’s give this a swerve!
You need to keep your date wondering. Provided you embrace the previous three tips, a little bit of intrigue ought to lead to date number two, three, four, etc. as your date gets to know you better over time.
But don’t confuse mystery for being aloof. If you spend the first date failing to ask and answer questions, you’ll come across as disinterested.
Did You Know? – A study discovered that the key to landing a second date was to ask questions.
Photo credit: Audra for Hey Saturday, NYC
Oh, And Don’t Forget to Ask!
Finally, there’s one sure fire way to increase the chances of landing that second date: ask.
Yes, this might be a bit out there for some, contravening an obscure set of second date rules devised by glossy magazines and so-called ‘dating experts’ but dating isn’t a game. If you like someone, and you enjoyed yourself, and you feel your date enjoyed themselves too, just ask to see them again.
It really is that simple. Don’t dance around the question, playing text tag for weeks on end. Just ask. Sure, they might say no, but if you don’t ask, you’ll never know.
Win the First, Get The Second
These five tips might seem like common sense, but that’s all there really is to winning a second date.
Be prepared. Be engaging. Be funny, charming, warm, and kind. Ask questions, listen intently, and don’t overshare.
And when you do all of those things – and you feel that connection – you’ll be ready to confidently ask the big question: “Can we do this again?”