4 steps to get more of the dates you want

Yes, believe it

If you give these four simple steps a go, you will start to get more of the dates you want rolling in and you’ll put off more of the dates you don’t. Sound good? Read on.

1. Put yourself out there

So there’s no easy way to say this but if you want more quality dates, then you’re going to have to buckle up and put yourself out there more. Dating, I learned fairly quickly, is really just a numbers game. Once you recognise this and go with it, you’re halfway there. If finding a partner is really important to you, then you’re going to have to make it one of your priorities in between working, commuting, partying and sleeping. If you set aside say 20 minutes a day to work on this, it will make a huge difference. And my advice would be to bring some energy and passion into the mix, it will help you get in the right mindset.

2. Be confident

I come back to this a lot, but before you kickstart your dating mischief, you need to be feeling the self-love. If you’re not, you will attract all kinds of wrong dates. And if you’re not feeling very confident, you’re more likely to waste time on them too. Sound familiar? Self-confidence will ensure you expect high standards from your partner and, more importantly, help you kick them to the kerb if they don’t meet those standards. Going into this thing with confidence is hugely important as it will save you time and heartbreak further down the line. Go forth and kick dating ass!

3. Be yourself

When Oscar Wilde said “be yourself; everyone else is already taken” he got it spot on as far as online dating is concerned. There’s only one you and you’re pretty cool (see point 2). By showcasing the real you, you will make it much easier to attract the right kind of person. Check over your profile and see if you have any of those type of all-inclusive beauties like “I am just as happy walking on the beach as I am shopping in town” or “I am just as happy wearing a pair of heels as I am in wellies” etc. You know the type of lines I’m talking about, don’t you? They don’t actually mean anything and they certainly don’t say anything useful about you. What they actually say is that you’re afraid to turn people off; you’re trying to please everyone. It may feel counter-intuitive but it is OK to turn people off with your profile – you will be doing yourself a favour in the long term. It’s time to hone in on what is unique about you and highlight it here.

ok we’re almost at the finish line – hang in there…

4. Suprise & delight

There is a whole surprise & delight movement out there in the world of communications, which, from what I understand (and I ain’t no expert here guys), is all about brands going the extra mile to impress and win fans and create a memorable interaction. Wouldn’t it be cool, if you could find a way of doing this in your dating profile? Your profile would immediately stand out from the masses in a good way and be infinitely more attractive. I know what you’re thinking. You want examples. Boy you work me hard. OK, well I guess for me, I might have hinted on my profile that dates with me might lead to an Indian Head Massage or better still a Reflexology session (I was qualified and insured at the time, of course). This usually went down very well but I’m sure you guys have better examples of your own.

You may have noticed that I haven’t mentioned your all important dating photos here. I think it goes without saying that the most important thing you can do to attract more of the dates you want is to create some awesome dating photos which capture the spirit of you. You know it. I don’t need to say it.